Today, I’m going to tell you why I ditched birth control and how to prevent pregnancy without it.
First of all, I believe that every woman should be fully informed of ALL her options before making a decision concerning what type of birth control she wishes to use.
And I don’t just mean fully informed of all your birth control options. No. I mean fully informed about your body, too! To help you understand more about your cycle and your fertility, I HIGHLY recommend the book “Taking Charge Of Your Fertility” by Toni Weschler, MPH (buy here). This is the book that changed my life.
“Taking Charge Of Your Fertility” is extremely informative, easy to read, and full of resources. The book looks large, but that’s because it’s full of resources, charts, and extra information you can look up on an as-needed basis. I also really appreciated that it was well-written and easy to read. My only regret is that I didn’t read it sooner.
Modern Birth Control
The current model of birth control is based off the faulty assumption that women can get pregnant at any given time. The reality is that in a given cycle, there is only a 25% chance we could achieve a pregnancy. Conversely, men are fertile 100% of the time, but they are not the ones targeted for birth control.
This is why I am huge believer in fertility awareness and body literacy. Women should be informed about themselves, their health, their cycles, their fertility, their femininity!
I have personally used the pill, condoms, the LadyComp, the copper IUD, and fertility awareness for birth control.
The Pill
When I married my first husband at 19, everyone I talked to recommended I get on the Pill so that I wouldn’t get pregnant while still in college. I took the Pill for 9 months, and then I just couldn’t do it anymore.
I constantly felt sick, moody, or bloated. My cervical fluid was strange, and I couldn’t get past the fact that long term side effects included blood clots and permanent blindness! The history of the Pill is even more foreboding. Just check out this excerpt from an article in New York Magazine:
The whole point of the Pill from the beginning has been population control. Even though America was consuming more than 50 percent of the world’s resources in the late fifties (with 6 percent of the world’s population), eugenicist fears of the developing world’s excessive procreation ran rampant during the Cold War. According to Andrea Tone’s fascinating history of contraception in America, Devices and Desires, Cold War–era birth-control proponents used the terms ‘family planning,’ ‘birth control,’ and ‘population control’ interchangeably. Women’s rights weren’t the primary impetus to approve the Pill, but they were part of the package, too, of course. “The Pill symbolized the redemption of science,” writes Tone, “showing it capable of developing a technology to stabilize a world order that it simultaneously threatened to destroy.”
After getting off the Pill, I used condoms for a few months, but, as everyone knows, condoms greatly decrease sensitivity and pleasure for both parties.
Still, if you must use condoms, I recommend the thinnest on the market: Beyond Seven Crown (buy here).
The LadyComp
The next thing I tried was the LadyComp, which is an ovulation tracker/computer that records your temperature and uses red, yellow, and green lights to tell you if you’re fertile or not. (Green means “GO! Have sex.” Red means “STOP! Use protection!”)
There are rave reviews about the amazingness of the LadyComp, but I personally did not find it helpful as a sole method of birth control, and here’s why:
- It does not allow for other factors, like caffeine or lack of sleep.
- The Ladycomp gives you quite a large window to take your temperature, which means it could vary greatly. It does not record the time you take it.
- The LadyComp will sometimes show you a green light before ovulation. The problem with this is if you have unprotected sex 5 days before you ovulate, there it still a chance you could get pregnant.
- It makes you lazy because you’re relying on the computer instead of being informed about your cycle.
- It’s less accurate than the Fertility Awareness Method.
- It costs $485 to buy, unlike the Fertility Awareness Method, which is free except for the cost of the book and a thermometer.
- Compared to the Fertility Awareness Method, the LadyComp allows for LESS unprotected sex per cycle because it has a higher margin of error.
- Because there are so many “Red days” where you have to use protection, a barrier method is needed most of the time anyway.
Copper IUD (Intrauterine Device)
When I got fed up with the LadyComp/condom combination, the next thing I tried was the copper IUD, which is inserted into the uterus through the cervix.
It is effective for up to ten years, is a non-hormonal form of birth control, and allows you to have sex without using a barrier at any point in your cycle.
What I wasn’t told before getting the IUD was that:
- It keeps the cervix in a constant state of inflammation.
- It can create copper toxicity in your body.
I also experienced:
- Periods that were heavy and lasted 8-10 days.
- Severe cramping during menstruation.
- Non-stop spotting on every day of my cycle.
- Pain during intercourse.
Well, lo and behold, my uterus expelled the IUD after 6 months! I had it reinserted, and I expelled it again after 3 months. My body knew what was best, I suppose!!
The copper IUD is also very expensive, and not all insurances cover it. I would not recommend it after my experience.
Fertility Awareness Method
(i.e. how to prevent pregnancy without hormones, pills, or invasive procedures)
FIRST OF ALL, the Fertility Awareness Method (FAM or FA) is NOT the same as the Rhythm Method. Fertility Awareness uses temperature readings, charting, cervical fluid observation, and cervical position to determine when ovulation has occurred. The Rhythm Method relies on counting days on the calendar—not bodily signs—to predict ovulation.
Anyway, after my body rejected the IUD (twice), I had no choice but to inform myself. I decided to take the plunge and buy “Taking Charge of Your Fertility” book for a grand total of $20. (I was seriously smacking myself for not doing this YEARS earlier.)
Learning to read your fertility signs for effective pregnancy prevention is one of the easiest things I’ve ever learned. All it requires is that you record both your temperature AND the time each morning when you awake. Taking your temperature each morning quickly becomes routine and is no extra work. And by charting, you can easily see when ovulation has passed and it is safe to have unprotected sex.
I like that unlike the LadyComp, charting your temperatures on paper allows you to visually see when you’ve ovulated. (Oh, BONUS, there is now a smartphone app!) By charting, you can also predict your period a few days in advance. After you chart for a while, you may get to the point where you can predict when you’ll start by the hour. It’s really neat!
Also, unlike the LadyComp, you can write down extenuating factors, like caffeine consumption, exercise, lack of sleep or interrupted sleep—all things that can affect your temperature.
By charting, you get a more accurate reading, so you can have unprotected sex more of the time.
And, if you ARE trying to get pregnant, if you’re charting, you can know as soon as 18 days after ovulation if you’re pregnant just by reading your temperatures!
To clarify, fertility awareness is where you identify the parts of the cycle you are in, when you are most fertile, and learn to (A) avoid sex during the few days you could get pregnant or (B) know when to use condoms or (C) know when you don’t have to use protection at all.
It’s as simple as taking your temperatures and writing them down. You just need to have the book to understand how to interpret them, which you can buy here.
Effectiveness
The Fertility Awareness Method has been proven as effective as the Pill if used correctly. I have personally been using it for over a year with excellent results: no baby! (***UPDATE: I’ve been charting for 59 cycles as of Jan 2017 and still, and still NO BABY! That’s almost 5 years folks!)
Taking my temperature every morning has become routine. You can also get your partner involved by having them put the thermometer in your mouth if you don’t hear the alarm. Some couples have found that both partners taking an active role has made them closer.
I WOULD RECOMMEND CHARTING FOR AT LEAST 3-4 MONTHS BEFORE USING IT AS BIRTH CONTROL. Just so you know what you’re doing and if you’re reading the signs right. In the meantime, barrier methods can be used.
I have found amazing freedom and peace by knowing what my body is doing and reading the signs my body is giving me. I also feel very empowered knowing that I can prevent or achieve pregnancy when the time comes.
I would love to try this (and I read the Fertility awareness book years ago), but I’ve found that my TEMPERATURE NEVER EVER CHANGES!!! Seriously, I’ve gotten pregnant 3 times using cervical mucus to cue me into my fertile times, but never had my temps change at any point in my cycle. I’ve tried all different kinds of ways and thermometers to take it too. Perhaps I’m defective! ;) I currently use the Mirena (non-copper) IUD and love it, only a little spotting at that time of the month and no issues with it, although I like the thought of going hormone free.
If you were able to observe your cervical mucus, it sounds like the Creighton Method would work perfectly for you. It’s solely based on charting cervical mucus changes throughout your cycle. No temps to take & no internal exams. It’s very scientific & as effective as the pill. You learn from a certified instructor, who will support you & be available to answer any questions that might arise. Also, it works for ANY woman-“normal” cycles or not. It would be a much better option than an IUD! :)
What, no mention of the pull out method? It has worked for us for 9 years and been much cheaper than any of the alternatives that we would have used during fertile times if we were trying to prevent pregnancy. I know it is not 100%effective but nothing else is either.
Any “unplanned” pregnancies while using a natural method of birth control/family planning is the result of USER ERROR, NOT METHOD ERROR. Somewhere along the line, a rule was broken or not followed exactly or you misread your signs. I speak from experience.
My husband and I have use the pull out method since 2006 and have been very successful.
My friend recently told me about this book. My husband and I use the Creighton Model of NFP (Natural Family Planning), and my doctor won’t even prescribe birth control to his patients. I feel amazing, thanks to charting my husband and I ALWAYS know where I’m at in my cycle, and it isn’t hard to abstain from sex the 5 days per month you are fertile. It makes it a join effort and he really understands how my body works and how outside factors like stress, antibiotics, etc. play a role in my cycle. I think more women need to be educated on their cycle when they’re younger. Everyone seems to be afraid of the female body, when it really isn’t that complicated. And people need to get over immediately thinking of ‘the rhythm method’ whenever they hear “no birth control”. First of all, the rhythm method is what some of our grandparents used, it is old, ineffective, and out of date. No one uses it anymore, yet people will not let it go. Being knowledgeable about your cycle has helped me diagnose low hormones, has helped friends of mine achieve pregnancy within 1-3 months after years of trying when other doctors couldn’t seem to help, and just helps you appreciate your body and how it works.
I use Creighton as well. It has helped me so much with my health. I cannot recommend it enough.
I’m no stranger to charting, and have charted my way through several planned conceptions, but I could never use it for birth control. I have PCOS and very few actual spontaneous ovulations per year, but my body tries to gear up to ovulate very, very often. I have fertile looking cervical mucous and favorable cervical position every few days. That is the nature of PCOS for many women. I added a saliva microscope a while back and I had ferning almost every single day for months and months. Estrogen dominance is a real thing and can make charting for prevention really tricky and probably impossible, at least for me.
Melissa Womack. I have PCOS also. I am sick of taking the pill to control it. Do you have any recommendations for natural remedies or prevention. I have no idea what to do at all. Any help or advice will be appreciated. Thanks!
I’d suggest trying the Creighton Method. I am a continuous mucus producer (assuming from estrogen dominance) & the method has provisions for that. It can work for EVERY woman.
I’m an NFP user for over 30 years. I tried Creighton, & it’s good but I had mucus all the time too. I switched to The Couple to Couple League Sympto-Thermal Method. ( CCLI.org) It was like night & day. I could tell when I ovulated with the temperature cross check. My husband & I were very happy with it. I’m post menopausal now so it can take you all through your fertile years. They offer classes with husband & wife teachers or online virtual classes. Also special classes to help navigate return of fertility after childbirth & entering menopause.
I like this post, however it won’t work for everyone. I was one of those folks who had cycles all over the place and no amount of charting could help, however with having such messed up cycles I was considered infertile and couldn’t get pregnant on my own. Ha! Double edged sword. Anyhow fast forward, I had to get an IUD and OMG awful! I bled for 8 straight months so I switched to the hormone one, still a lot of bleeding and soon just awful cramps, I had it pulled and on that same cycle I got pregnant. Which for us was perfect. Anyhow I’m curious what will happen post baby, ’cause I will not torture my body again with synthetic hormones but I don’t have regular cycles. Fun stuff in the land of infertility/ suddenly fertile. heh. (I blame my sudden fertility on years of a proper diet finally cleaning out my body and fixing what caused the infertility, but we’ll see if it holds true!)
Deadra, Taking Charge of your Fertility was the first book I read many years ago. I felt the same as you do. My cycles were all over the place. It does take time to learn this method when you have irregular cycles, but it can be done. I want to encourage you to try again, and learn your body, and the mucus (weird, I know) it produces. As a fellow irregular cycle lady, you need to take temp and (this part is key) check your cervical position and mucus EVERYDAY. My husband and I use Natural Family Planning (NFP). The difference between FAM and NFP is that we avoid sex during the fertile time (if we are trying to avoid a pregnancy). This was definitely a plus when learning my cervical position and mucus during the most crucial time! I hope this helps! Oh, and my cycles got better after each of my babies. Now I’m more regular than irregular.
I totally understand this viewpoint. I had my Mirena IUD removed in Dec. 2012 after 2.5 years (inserted 6 weeks after birth of 1st child) The hormones were wreaking my life and body. So I bought the book, and like so many, kicked myself several times for not buying it earlier. Since Dec, my cycles have been EVERYWHERE! My body is still trying to get in a solid rhythm. My cycles have varied from 24-32 days, with periods lasting anywhere from 1-3 days, luteal phase (LP) from 9-13 days long, and ovulation happening on days 13-19, and sometimes not at all. Reading the book, and tracking my cycles (I use a free android app: OvuView – SUPER EASY TO USE!) has helped me to feel somewhat in control of my body, and has even shown multiple fertility problems I currently have, and didn’t know about til I started charting. I’m thankful I read this book months BEFORE trying for baby #2.
Without the knowledge I have now, if we had started trying to conceive, with my LP defect, I would have kept miscarrying, and I wouldn’t have known why. (that’s if I were able to get pregnant in the first place without knowing when to time for intercourse.) It’s strange to me how with my 1st child, I wasn’t even trying to conceive, in fact, we used protection, and now that I want to give my DD a sibling, I’m not able to until I get my body healthy again; but I know what the problems are, have the knowledge of how to get healthy, and the book even explains different things to try to get your body back to fertile or even just regular(everything from natural to medically assisted) I’ve done additional research on how to correct my issues, and I’ve slowly, but surely, gotten my body headed in the right direction. I know what to expect, and when to expect it, and I’m doing a lot of different natural therapies and I can constructively see what is working. (example: when I regularly drink my custom fertility tea blend, my LP is longer than if I forget to drink it for a week or so) We hope to start trying for a baby this September/October, and if we are unable to conceive right away, at least I know that I’m doing a lot to get to the point I want to be, and can work harder over the winter/spring to get there for next fall to try again. (I have summers off, I don’t want to take unpaid maternity leave during the few months I work if I can help it!)
The book even goes into menopause – it’s definitely a book to keep forever. The author also has an age appropriate book for teenagers; I bought it for my younger step-sister and she loves it. I highly suggest giving FAM a good solid try, if for nothing else but to see what exactly your body is doing and to feel more connected within.
In my above novel I forgot to mention that as birth control, it’s been great. Even though my cycles are crazy, I still have my fertile moments – and I know about them from charting temps and Cervical Fluid. And as awful as it may sound… showing my husband my chart to back up why we shouldn’t have sex that week sure beats the “I have a headache” line. (I guess we’re more NFP than FAM – like I said above, 1 baby already with condom use, not willing to chance it again when the timing isn’t right)
I hope this helps someone out there.
Courtney, thank you for this post! I just got off the pill after being on it since I was 16 and I’m 28 now. I had normal periods before the pill and while on it, but now I’m worried the pill messed up my body, because now my period is late. Any idea how to get my body back to normal and balanced naturally? I’ve never wanted my period so bad in my life lol. Any suggestions? Thank you!!
Diet and sleep play a huge roll in balancing hormones, so that’s where I would start really analyzing my lifestyle.
great article, I have to say that hormonal birth control scares me. I took both the pill and also used the nuva ring at various stages of my life. I didn’t have many physical side effects, for me it was just horrible emotional side effects.
I have been using NFP since my daughter was born, first to NOT conceive and then to conceive. It has definitely worked for us, and I would definitely recommend people look into it.
I don’t think I will ever go back to OTC forms of birth control now :)
I had the copper IUD for several years and did not start experiencing problems until the month I had it taken out. Heavy, heavy periods and recurring BV. It really changed how things worked down there and it took YEARS to get back to normal. This may not be a deal breaker for all, but I was not aware of HOW the copper IUD worked when I first got it, which eventually led to my decision to remove it. One of the ways that the IUD works is by causing the abortion of a fertilized and sometimes implanted embryo….not something most gynos will bring up proactively and many will skirt the issue when asked directly.
What if you have thyroid problems and your temps tend to be lower? Does that effect it at all? Do you have to take your temp the exact time every day? Iv never tried taking my temp regularly, but I do shift work so would my temps be lower if iv done a night shift? Cheers
I have PCOS and my cycles are very irregular. Which method would you recommend for that?
Creighton Method. :)