Today, I’m going to tell you why I ditched birth control and how to prevent pregnancy without it.
First of all, I believe that every woman should be fully informed of ALL her options before making a decision concerning what type of birth control she wishes to use.
And I don’t just mean fully informed of all your birth control options. No. I mean fully informed about your body, too! To help you understand more about your cycle and your fertility, I HIGHLY recommend the book “Taking Charge Of Your Fertility” by Toni Weschler, MPH (buy here). This is the book that changed my life.
“Taking Charge Of Your Fertility” is extremely informative, easy to read, and full of resources. The book looks large, but that’s because it’s full of resources, charts, and extra information you can look up on an as-needed basis. I also really appreciated that it was well-written and easy to read. My only regret is that I didn’t read it sooner.
Modern Birth Control
The current model of birth control is based off the faulty assumption that women can get pregnant at any given time. The reality is that in a given cycle, there is only a 25% chance we could achieve a pregnancy. Conversely, men are fertile 100% of the time, but they are not the ones targeted for birth control.
This is why I am huge believer in fertility awareness and body literacy. Women should be informed about themselves, their health, their cycles, their fertility, their femininity!
I have personally used the pill, condoms, the LadyComp, the copper IUD, and fertility awareness for birth control.
The Pill
When I married my first husband at 19, everyone I talked to recommended I get on the Pill so that I wouldn’t get pregnant while still in college. I took the Pill for 9 months, and then I just couldn’t do it anymore.
I constantly felt sick, moody, or bloated. My cervical fluid was strange, and I couldn’t get past the fact that long term side effects included blood clots and permanent blindness! The history of the Pill is even more foreboding. Just check out this excerpt from an article in New York Magazine:
The whole point of the Pill from the beginning has been population control. Even though America was consuming more than 50 percent of the world’s resources in the late fifties (with 6 percent of the world’s population), eugenicist fears of the developing world’s excessive procreation ran rampant during the Cold War. According to Andrea Tone’s fascinating history of contraception in America, Devices and Desires, Cold War–era birth-control proponents used the terms ‘family planning,’ ‘birth control,’ and ‘population control’ interchangeably. Women’s rights weren’t the primary impetus to approve the Pill, but they were part of the package, too, of course. “The Pill symbolized the redemption of science,” writes Tone, “showing it capable of developing a technology to stabilize a world order that it simultaneously threatened to destroy.”
After getting off the Pill, I used condoms for a few months, but, as everyone knows, condoms greatly decrease sensitivity and pleasure for both parties.
Still, if you must use condoms, I recommend the thinnest on the market: Beyond Seven Crown (buy here).
The LadyComp
The next thing I tried was the LadyComp, which is an ovulation tracker/computer that records your temperature and uses red, yellow, and green lights to tell you if you’re fertile or not. (Green means “GO! Have sex.” Red means “STOP! Use protection!”)
There are rave reviews about the amazingness of the LadyComp, but I personally did not find it helpful as a sole method of birth control, and here’s why:
- It does not allow for other factors, like caffeine or lack of sleep.
- The Ladycomp gives you quite a large window to take your temperature, which means it could vary greatly. It does not record the time you take it.
- The LadyComp will sometimes show you a green light before ovulation. The problem with this is if you have unprotected sex 5 days before you ovulate, there it still a chance you could get pregnant.
- It makes you lazy because you’re relying on the computer instead of being informed about your cycle.
- It’s less accurate than the Fertility Awareness Method.
- It costs $485 to buy, unlike the Fertility Awareness Method, which is free except for the cost of the book and a thermometer.
- Compared to the Fertility Awareness Method, the LadyComp allows for LESS unprotected sex per cycle because it has a higher margin of error.
- Because there are so many “Red days” where you have to use protection, a barrier method is needed most of the time anyway.
Copper IUD (Intrauterine Device)
When I got fed up with the LadyComp/condom combination, the next thing I tried was the copper IUD, which is inserted into the uterus through the cervix.
It is effective for up to ten years, is a non-hormonal form of birth control, and allows you to have sex without using a barrier at any point in your cycle.
What I wasn’t told before getting the IUD was that:
- It keeps the cervix in a constant state of inflammation.
- It can create copper toxicity in your body.
I also experienced:
- Periods that were heavy and lasted 8-10 days.
- Severe cramping during menstruation.
- Non-stop spotting on every day of my cycle.
- Pain during intercourse.
Well, lo and behold, my uterus expelled the IUD after 6 months! I had it reinserted, and I expelled it again after 3 months. My body knew what was best, I suppose!!
The copper IUD is also very expensive, and not all insurances cover it. I would not recommend it after my experience.
Fertility Awareness Method
(i.e. how to prevent pregnancy without hormones, pills, or invasive procedures)
FIRST OF ALL, the Fertility Awareness Method (FAM or FA) is NOT the same as the Rhythm Method. Fertility Awareness uses temperature readings, charting, cervical fluid observation, and cervical position to determine when ovulation has occurred. The Rhythm Method relies on counting days on the calendar—not bodily signs—to predict ovulation.
Anyway, after my body rejected the IUD (twice), I had no choice but to inform myself. I decided to take the plunge and buy “Taking Charge of Your Fertility” book for a grand total of $20. (I was seriously smacking myself for not doing this YEARS earlier.)
Learning to read your fertility signs for effective pregnancy prevention is one of the easiest things I’ve ever learned. All it requires is that you record both your temperature AND the time each morning when you awake. Taking your temperature each morning quickly becomes routine and is no extra work. And by charting, you can easily see when ovulation has passed and it is safe to have unprotected sex.
I like that unlike the LadyComp, charting your temperatures on paper allows you to visually see when you’ve ovulated. (Oh, BONUS, there is now a smartphone app!) By charting, you can also predict your period a few days in advance. After you chart for a while, you may get to the point where you can predict when you’ll start by the hour. It’s really neat!
Also, unlike the LadyComp, you can write down extenuating factors, like caffeine consumption, exercise, lack of sleep or interrupted sleep—all things that can affect your temperature.
By charting, you get a more accurate reading, so you can have unprotected sex more of the time.
And, if you ARE trying to get pregnant, if you’re charting, you can know as soon as 18 days after ovulation if you’re pregnant just by reading your temperatures!
To clarify, fertility awareness is where you identify the parts of the cycle you are in, when you are most fertile, and learn to (A) avoid sex during the few days you could get pregnant or (B) know when to use condoms or (C) know when you don’t have to use protection at all.
It’s as simple as taking your temperatures and writing them down. You just need to have the book to understand how to interpret them, which you can buy here.
Effectiveness
The Fertility Awareness Method has been proven as effective as the Pill if used correctly. I have personally been using it for over a year with excellent results: no baby! (***UPDATE: I’ve been charting for 59 cycles as of Jan 2017 and still, and still NO BABY! That’s almost 5 years folks!)
Taking my temperature every morning has become routine. You can also get your partner involved by having them put the thermometer in your mouth if you don’t hear the alarm. Some couples have found that both partners taking an active role has made them closer.
I WOULD RECOMMEND CHARTING FOR AT LEAST 3-4 MONTHS BEFORE USING IT AS BIRTH CONTROL. Just so you know what you’re doing and if you’re reading the signs right. In the meantime, barrier methods can be used.
I have found amazing freedom and peace by knowing what my body is doing and reading the signs my body is giving me. I also feel very empowered knowing that I can prevent or achieve pregnancy when the time comes.
I’ve been using the Persona Monitor (www.persona.info/uk) for the past couple of years and I’d totally recommend it. Like the LadyComp it has red, green and yellow lights, but it measures the hormone levels in your pee rather than your temperature. You have to check about 8 times a month (whenever the yellow light shows). And the longer you use it the more green days you get. I don’t think they’re available to buy outside Europe though (unless maybe through ebay?). The only disadvantage is the price of the test sticks, around £10 a month.
Thanks for the breakdown. I have tried the depo shot, the nuva ring and I absolutely HATED both. Now hubby and I use condoms (sparingly lol) but Im looking to really start charting seriously so I can truly know what my body is doing to prepare for TTC in the next year. I really wish they had TCOYF in middle school when girls need to learn about their bodies the most, but that would be too much like right lol.
Thanks so much for this informative article! You’ve inspired me to pull my “Taking Charge…” book off the bookshelf and actually read it! :-) I have two copies actually – bought both of them several years apart at different thrift shops, for a quarter a piece! My husband just recently returned from an 8-month deployment, so it’s time to start thinking about some sort of birth control again, else we will most likely have #5 on the way soon, and I’m not quite ready… Our youngest, who’s almost 3, was born when my dh was home for his 2 weeks R&R on his previous deployment.
I took the pill when we first got married, before I knew otherwise, and we’ve used condoms (dh is NOT a fan) and also the diaphragm a few years ago, but I never really got used to it, so it went unused most of the time. I had considered both the IUD and the LadyComp, so I am glad to read your reviews of them before sinking a bunch of money into something. You’ve inspired me to try the FAM approach – thank you!
So glad I could help! I love my FAM book and reference it often, so I keep it on my bedside table at all times. Besides being so informative, it’s actually a great read. I think Toni Weschler does a great job writing in a way that is interesting and simple/broken-down.
Thanks to your husband and you for his service and your support. My husband, Frank, is a veteran and was deployed in Iraq for a year back in 2005 as a medic. He’s out of the military now, but we are thankful to those families still serving.
Just hearing “inflamed uterus” makes me hurt!
Great post, thanks for jumping through all the hoops for us and sharing your research :) I’ll check the book out!
Thanks for reading! :)
After being on the pill for a couple years, we couldn’t figure out why we couldn’t get pregnant after stopping it. The Fertility Awareness Method helped us get all the pregnancies I had.
This method works!
Now that I’m in my 40’s, I’m not very fertile, and needed something with hormones to help me even out my cycle. I *had* (term is relative here!) to go back on the pill just to even out my cycles. It was difficult to have a 2 week long period and then spotting. Since being back on this particular pill, my cycles are minimal and I don’t have that many. I skip every few months.
I hope to go off it someday, but in the meantime, other than some weight gain, my body has been ok.
while the goal of a copper IUD is to make the environment hostile to the sperm so that is cannot reach the egg, it is not 100% so sometimes fertilization will occur. Then it is dependent on how hostile the uterine environment is as to whether or not the fertilized ovum will actually implant or abort. So if you believe that life begins at conception (when the cells begin dividing and become a living, unique entity) then this is NOT the birth control method for you.
how does it factor in stress or other outside elements? I.e. like a lower than normal average body temp, or higher than normal. What about certain medications that affect your cycle, environmental factors and pheromones given off by other women . My period is USUALLY about the 9th of the month, but has changed over the years due to other outside factors. 1 month it came 2 weeks early because my close neighbor was pregnant, then it was late the next month as I had 2 periods the previous month and my body was trying to regulate back to my normal “time”. Not to mention as you go enter the age of menopause you are more susceptible to you cycle jump starting if you are around pregnant women or small children What if your sick? A fever would throw this WHOLE process off, even a low grade fever would mess up the equation. Theres SOOO many other factors I can think of that would mess this up, just depending on TEMPs and timeframes……
The book has chapters and appendices that cover all of these topics and “what ifs” and different factors that can affect your cycle. It teaches you how to accomodate these factors and read your chart with them factored in.
I started on birth control at 17 and hated it. I was on the depo shot for a year and switched to the pill after I noticed heavier cycles and massive mood swings. The pill cause even more mood swings so my now fiance and I decided to kick out birth contro, and keep up with my ovulation cycle the old fashioned way and practice safe sex. 4 years later and still no baby. We will see how planning for a baby works out and how soon I can get pregnant when the time comes :)
Good for you! I never took the depo shot (scared me too much because I didn’t know what it would do to my biology), but the pill made me feel so awful. Glad that FAM is working for you! :)
while living in Germany I used something similar to the Ladycomp. But on mine you had to pee on a stripe and let the comp read it then it gave you a green or red or yellow light.
I have not found anything like this here in the States.
The LadyComp is actually German-made.
Just my small $0.02 on the matter….
I was on the pill from age 17 to age 20. While being 20, active and smoking. I got a Pulmonary Embolism (PE) triggered by taking the pill, along with stress, smoking, and poor eating habits.
I went to the ER with pains in my side (liver area), shortness of breath, and vertigo. Due to not having ANY health insurance the hospital tried to send me home on painkillers, telling me they didn’t know what was wrong with me, and to WAIT 72 before returning to the ER. I refused to leave and insisted they run more tests. After having a family member co-sign for more tests an MRI was done and they saw the blood clot and admitted me to the hospital. I was told that IF I had gone home as suggested by the ER Doctor, I would have DIED in less than 6 HOURS (dead long before the 72 hour wait period).
Much later in life, like when I 30ish my family doctor told me the pains I felt in my side was from my organs being starved from oxygen from the blood clot, I also had tingling in my left arm from my pinky up to my arm pit, also signs that I was not getting enough oxygen from the clot(s). When I had vertigo I knew it was time to go the hospital. So glad I did, and that I stayed there until ALL the tests were done.
The commercials on TV mention about how smoking “can” trigger a blood clot IF you are 35 or older. I was 20, not 35.
My friend was 17 and she wasn’t as lucky as you were… It can happen to anyone unfortunately, I wouldn’t listen to ads. It’s not like your body says on your birthday, oh hey, I’m 35 now, let’s allow blood clots to form.