What is anger?
Is anger inherently right? wrong? good? bad?
Anger is a natural reaction to something you love/value being threatened.
If you’re angry, ask yourself…what are you valuing that’s being threatened?
Anger comes from what you believe, not what people are doing to you.
When you’re angry, ask yourself, “What is is this big thing that’s so important to me that I’m defending? What is this big thing that’s so important to me that I’m willing to clobber everyone around me to get it instead of lose it?”
Anger is not inherently wrong. Anger is defending something you love. It is arguably a pure form of love. Anger is not the opposite of love. Hate is. Extreme hate is indifference. Anger is love in motion.
What do you love? What do you value? What are you protecting? Is it worth protecting? SHOULD you be protecting this?
The Bible does not condemn anger but instead promotes SLOW anger vs NO anger.
Admit your anger, claim it, identify the cause, decide the best course of action OUTSIDE of the emotion of anger.
James 1:19–20 (ESV)
19 Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; 20 for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.
What we can learn from children…
As a parent, one of the worst things you can hear from your child is:
“You don’t love me!” and “I hate you!”
(For most parents) this is the most unjustified, disordered rage possible. It is a huge test for the parent. Most parents will sacrifice more for their children than even for their spouse. When your child says this, it hurts so much that you have to make a choice. You can do one of three things:
(2) Rage back
(3) Absorb the child’s anger
God does not withdraw from us.
God does not rage back.
God came and absorbed our rage on the cross!
If we love our children, then we know that the only way to save them is to absorb their anger without paying it back. To be calm and firmly insist on the truth. “I love you.”
God came and as soon as he was in human form within our grasp, we killed Him with our anger. And what did He do? He absorbed it, to save us.
Proverbs 19:11 (ESV)
Good sense makes one slow to anger,
and it is his glory to overlook an offense.
Proverbs 16:32 (ESV)
Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty,
and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city.